A kid in a candy store? A hungry dog with a pork chop? Tiger walking into the Foxy Lady?

Your humble Pro in the Professional Golfers Association of America 57th Annual Merchandise Show? Call it euphoria!

We’ve heard about the show and have been curious about it for years so we traveled to Orlando to check it out. It was definitely worth the trip. The industry considers this the kick-off of a new golf year.

The show is an extravagant display of goods and services from almost 1000 vendors with anything directly or even remotely connected to the golf industry. It’s open only to PGA professionals, members of the golf industry in general and the media. And, as they say in Texas, a lot of “bidness” is transacted.

Where to begin? The first of the three and one half days of the show is conducted at Orange County National Golf Center outside of Orlando. The facility has three courses but the nexus of the place is the practice range.

Demo Day Courtesy of PGA of America

There aren’t many vacant spaces near a big city you could build this thing. It’s a one-mile in circumference circle with a diameter of about 450 yards. There are some permanent structures in spots to shield players from the elements along with a couple of putting greens on the perimeter. It has targets set throughout the center field area.

The equipment companies set up tents and stalls and provide samples of their latest and greatest technologically advanced new clubs. Eager sales and marketing people give their spiel about what their particular design will do to make your game sooooo much improved.

Even a lowly writer was accorded first class treatment. Clearly we weren’t a buyer but time was taken to chat and, we presume, plant the notion of a positive mention in a future column.

Courtesy PGA of America

So, as a consumer/buyer one can do the entire loop and test everything new including putters and sand wedges on three or four putting greens scattered about. We sat on the grass and just gazed at the assemblage more than a couple of times.

Massachusetts based Titleist had the largest display area teeming with associates eager to explain what the mad scientists have come up with to improve players’ games. We’ll write about interesting things we found in a future column.

Adding to the sizzle was a sprinkling of tour professionals who signed autographs, gave pep talks and hit some balls at their respective sponsors’ locales. Justin Leonard and Suzann Pettersen were two that we saw. The players were accessible and relaxed most likely because they were comfortable in the knowledge they were amidst industry professionals.

Opening Day Courtesy PGA of America

Thursday through Saturday the focus switched to the Orange County Convention Center in Orlando.

To give you a sense of the size of this place, it appears it could be the crate that Boston’s brand new convention center was shipped in. It is immense and we were in only one of the three buildings comprising the entity.

According to the PGA of America, there were about 40,000 attendees and ten miles of aisles.  We’re not sure about the number of people but our feet pretty much confirmed the ten miles. After the first day we felt we had walked 36 holes.

It is said there are so many restaurants in New York city, that combined with openings and closings, you could not visit them all in a lifetime. One got that feeling in the OCCC.

Being a rookie, we set out eagerly and diligently working our way from one vendor to another up the first few aisles. We felt a tinge of guilt when an enthusiastic rep went into their pitch since we knew it wasn’t gong to lead to a sale and they had neglected to closely examine our credential.

That sense wore off after being physically accosted and dragged to a booth for the umpteenth time in the first couple of hours. One surprise was that you could buy single units of certain things like sun glasses, club shafts, putters and distance measuring devices. So, there were folks wandering about laden with bags full of things they just couldn’t live without.

Thank the lord for the media center and several scheduled press conferences. Those gave us a chance to retreat from the exhibit floor and crash for a while.

Although not thoroughly consistent, the floor is arranged by category so club manufacturers are in one general section, clothing and soft goods in another, travel destinations in a third and so on. It didn’t take long to decide that each particular sortie should be programmed to cover a particular grouping.

At one end of the hall was a stage and seating area where the PGA of America hosted presentations of awards and key note addresses from an assortment of folks including the Governor of the Florida, Charlie Crist. 

FL Governor Crist Courtesy PGA of America

Governor Crist ain’t no dummy. At length he laid out just how important golf is to his domain starting with the 1287 facilities and 1.7 million in-state golfers.

In the evenings there were invite only cocktail parties presented by top drawer equipment and apparel manufacturers as well as destination countries like Ireland and Wales, the latter being the host country for the Ryder Cup this year.

Friday and Saturday brought the same drill and one approached sensory overload as time passed. The veterans of the march note they go to the show with very specific objectives and, once accomplished, head for the course or the bar.

The PGA of America issued a release after the show quoting a number of exhibitors as saying business was better than last year and better than they expected. That having been said, most of the veterans we spoke with said albeit big, the show is a mere shadow of its former self.

For this reporter, it was just the right size and a good way to celebrate the new year.

For many of us New Englanders, the golf season doesn’t end until we say it ends.

Ah, well, not so fast.

Mother Nature just lowered the boom. Saturday we could see green grass and with just a few more degrees of temperature or a little less wind, we might have squeezed in another nine.

Gone. Done. Fini.

The storm forecast early last week that would pass harmlessly south of us…didn’t. So, we’re buried in snow and, short of a tropical blast, the 2009 golf season in New England is over. Even the Cape is covered with nearly two feet of white and likely will be for a while. Where’s Al Gore?

If that isn’t depressing enough, anyone desperate for a golf fix who tuned in to 3 Tour Challenge on Sunday had to be contemplating just how their lives had reached that depth of misery. No stones being thrown here, we watched out of morbid curiosity. We feel shame. 

Hello, my name is Pro and I have a problem.

But take heart golfers there are several things to ponder, not all of them delusional.

Today is the first day of winter and the last of the shortening daylight. The sun is setting later each day. We have turned the corner and are headed back toward brightness. 

2010 is ten days away and, for some of our pals, those days will pass quickly with the excess consumption of wassail. Could someone please tell us what is wassail?

For those of us anchored in the northeast for the winter we can hope for an early spring, at least on the Cape. Some of our fondest memories are of the first few rounds of the year being played in February and March across the canal. It’s a wonderful road trip infused with laughs and sauted in the promise of a new season ahead.

What to do until then? Lots.

At the top of the list is stay in golf shape. Stretch, swing a weighted club and roll some putts in your living room. 

Take walks. Even those of you who ride, you walk more than you realize. Go to the dreaded mall. Okay, okay, we know the stigma of the “mall walkers” but pretend you’re shopping. No one cares, anyway. Or do it outdoors around the block. That’s better for you anyway.

There are several outdoor driving ranges in our area with heated stalls open all winter. Every couple weeks, on a warmish day, hit a bucket just to remind your muscles what hitting a golf ball is all about.

We’re not fans of indoor ranges because ball flight is too short, but they’re better than nothing. Some of the top golf retailers in the area have demo nets and who’s going to rat you out if you test drive an assortment of clubs once every couple of weeks?

We have a pal whose house abuts a large field. On a decent day, he’ll take a bunch of beaten up balls, an old mat and pound a few balls out into the snow. He’s his own shag boy when the weather clears. One of the good things about golf balls in this era is you just can’t kill them. So, scuffed or not, they’re still usable for practice.

The Winter Solstice?  No humbug at this address. What it means is we’re one day closer to the next golf season.

The last time out seven weeks ago, if we counted all the strokes, we wouldn’t have broken 100. This by a player who started learning the game 50 years ago, was as low as a five handicap at one point and entered this season playing to an eight.

It was not a pretty sight. Worse, the rest of the foursome quickly tired of our incessant whining.

We’ve praised golf in many ways over many years but the core attribute of the game comes down to one word: fun. Golf offers a challenging sport on a beautiful venue alongside people with whom we want to spend time. It’s great exercise when walking. It’s healthy. It gets the competitive juices flowing. But most of all it’s fun.

Struggling to break 100 when accustomed to occasional rounds in the 70’s and the majority in the 80’s is like sticking needles under ones’ fingernails. We were angry, frustrated, confused but most of all, we were unhappy and we were lousy company. The game ceased to be fun. We began looking for reasons to not play.

“Sorry guys, I’d love to but I have to get my nails done.”

So, as discussed earlier this year we took our own advice and stepped away from the game. No lessons. No practice. No nothing except for one thing. Out of desperation we bought a copy of  “Golf Is Not A Game of Perfect” by Bob Rotella.

Rotella has earned quite a big reputation for being the golf shrink. He has a lengthy list of  Tour pros he consults about the mental part of the game. His central theme is to relax the mind, accept that bad shots will happen and focus on positive things and outcomes.

However, throughout his tome, he hammers home another theme: work on your short game! Gee, ya think?

He presses this truism most of us know: something like 65% of our shots come from within 50 yards of the green. So hit wedges and putts and your worries will be over. Swell.

Thanks, Bob. We really didn’t need to spend $22.95 to know that.

However, he also tracks back to the essence of the game which is to have fun. It’s a important reminder. We get so emotionally invested in the results of our shots we lose sight of why we are there in the first place.

We had decided not to play until Spring but the great weather forecast for this past weekend combined with a call from one of our favorite golf pals pursuaded us to give it a go. There aren’t many places more beautiful in the Fall than a parkland golf course in New England.

We stretched, hit a few balls on the range, rolled a couple of putts and on the first tee apologized profusely for what was about to happen. Our pals, displaying familiar disdain, saw it as a ploy to get more shots. Balderdash.

So it began. Duck hook drive, skied three wood, too short pitch, three putts. Double bogey. Oh no.

Second hole, center of the fairway drive (promising?), hooked approach, good pitch with bad result, three putts. Double bogey. Taxi?

Then it happened. Par three. Ten feet. Burned the edge of the cup for birdie. PAR. Followed by four more on the front. Three pars and a kick in birdie three on the back. 86 for the day with a bunch of three putts on linoleum greens and some obvious rust.

Standing on the eighteenth tee we turned to the guys who knew what we’ve been going through and said, “It’s fun again.”  Then we snap hooked into the weeds and finished with a double but it didn’t matter. We hit enough good shots to know the ability is still in there.

So we’re eager to play again. If the snow flies tomorrow and the courses close, we’ll enter the Winter with the knowledge that come Spring, we’ll be back at it and we’ll focus on having fun.

A decent interval was what we  needed.

Dry mouthed, hand twitching, sphincter tightening, palm sweating, brain lock inducing terror is just around the corner. Nope, it’s not the Salem Halloween fright extravaganza. It’s PGA Tour Qualifying Tournaments.

Q School!

Oh, the horror! Hide the women and children! Torture may violate the Geneva Conventions but it’s alive and well in professional golf.

Contrary to popular wisdom, there are now four stages. The PGA Tour held what is called ”pre qualifying” tournaments in September at several locations. Just over two hundred players emerged from that hoard and are entered in the first of the three “real” stages beginning next week at eleven courses across the country.

One of the grand illusions of the Q School death march is that it’s a series of elimination tournaments. It is and it isn’t. Yes, in each specific event there will be a certain number of players who survive and move on to the next event. That’s fine. But then the survivors are joined by a whole new set of players who were exempted from having to play in the preceding tournament for one reason or another.

Here are some of the numbers from the 2008 qualifying tournaments:

• 951 entered the first stage and 315 moved to the next.
• Those 315 were joined by an additional 185 players of which 125 advanced to the final stage.
• Those were joined by 38 more and then the top 25 and ties received their Tour card for 2009.

Of course, making it even more difficult for budding youngsters is the players who were exempted into a particular stage are increasingly better and more experienced. They are high money earners from the Nationwide Tour, players from Europe and Asia, PGA Tour players who didn’t break into the 125 money list, players who made a certain number of cuts. It gets tougher and tougher until the final 108 holes.

This year the final six rounds will be played on two courses at Bear Lakes Golf Club in Florida in early December. The Golf Network will be televising it and it gets pretty compelling as the players approach the final 18.

As noted, the top 25 and ties are given their Tour cards for the next year which is dandy except it doesn’t guarantee that they will get into every event because of the numerical limits on tournament entries. Players are arranged in a hierarchy from #1 (Tiger) on down. It is not unusual for a low qualifying player to get into only a dozen or so events in a season. In round numbers there could be almost 200 with tour privileges.

• The top 125 money earners from the year before.
• The top 25 plus ties from Q school.
• The top 25 money earners from the Nationwide Tour the prior year.
• Money earners number 126 to 150 from the PGA Tour the prior year.
• Special exemptions from having won a PGA Tour event in the preceding two years.
• Major winners for a certain number of years.

Inasmuch as most tournaments have a field of 144, that tournament directors usually have four sponsor’s picks and there is occasionally a local qualifier event for a couple of slots, the odds of a low ranking player getting into certain fields are not great.

During the season, the deck is reshuffled a couple of times based upon performance moving people up and down. If you are low on the list, getting in an event is a problem and then the pressure is to not only make the cuts but earn enough money to get into the top 125 by year end so one doesn’t have to go through it all again.

There is some solace in the final stage. The next fifty players after those who receive tour privileges are given open access to the Nationwide Tour which is no longer small potatoes. The top earner this year, with two events remaining, has more than $500,000 in prize money and many players make something north of $100,000. Granted, there are weekly expenses for hotel, meals, entry fees, caddies and transportation but at least break even is within grasp.

But for the rest who put up their $5000 entry fee plus, plus…it’s back to the practice range. Yeeesh! It makes the haunted house look inviting.

It may be a unique American gene in our national DNA. When we find something appealing, we replicate, duplicate, masticate and imitate it until the specialness is gone.

It wasn’t good enough that “Who Wants to be a Millionaire” got great ratings. Nope, the network decided to put it on three nights a week.  And “Deal or no Deal” is another.

How about reality TV? “American Idol” begets “America’s Got Talent” begets “Dancing with the Stars” begets “So You Think You Can Dance?” and on and on. We can only imagine the show concepts that have been presented and mercifully euthanized in a producer’s office. As P.T. Barnum allegedly said, “Give ‘em what they want.”

So, here’s the Presidents Cup this week, spawn of the Ryder Cup. It’s the eighth iteration of this team competition being played on a wonderful public course in San Francisco, Harding Park Golf Club. It’s contested in alternate years as the counterpoint to the Ryder Cup.

The US captain is Fred Couples, Mr. Smooth. The International captain is Greg Norman, Mr. Alimony. Actually come to think if it, Couples and Norman may have more divorces between them than majors. Maybe not.

We love the Ryder Cup. Granted, the original version with the US against Great Britain evolved into a boring, predictable biennial US rout. But Jack Nicklaus had the foresight and the influence to introduce the modification which brought the rest of Europe into the mix. That was a stroke of genius and has resulted in wonderful, enthralling, gut-wrenching, competitive contests.

So now we have the Presidents Cup which pits US players against stars from the rest of the world. The opposition this year has players from South Africa, Australia, South Korea, Columbia and elsewhere. It’s a potpourri of professionals. And Tiger is playing for us.

Yet, for some reason, in this corner it’s just not particularly exciting because it’s a knock-off of the real deal.

What’s particularly interesting is having Greg Norman as the captain. Several years ago Norman came up with the idea of a world tour of tournaments and he was lobbying players to more or less break away from the PGA Tour. The Tour folks aren’t too stupid and there are those who say they ripped off Norman’s idea and created the World Golf Championships we now see integrated into the regular Tour season as well as the Presidents Cup.

The other interesting side bar relates to the extremely chilly relationship between the PGA and the PGA Tour. We have alluded to this in the past and will dig into it sometime in the future. But the wrinkle here is that the PGA owns and operates the Ryder Cup and the PGA Tour was more than a little bit jealous of not just the competitive success but the enormous amount of money generated by the event.

Thus we have the Presidents Cup, owned and operated by the PGA Tour. What a coincidence.

So we end up with the Ryder Cup and what a friend refers to as Ryder Cup Lite. We like that characterization. The Presidents Cup is a pale imitation of the real deal.

We’ll watch. Two years ago in Montreal Woody Austin played the clown and it made for entertaining television. It’s also always fun witnessing the best gag over three foot putts. Perhaps it’s the same attitude we have toward watching car races as we await the next crash. It’s not that we particularly care about the specific event but we are drawn by the prospect of catastrophe.

The Fed Ex Cup is not working!

Here are a few of the problems:

• No one, including the players involved, completely understands it.
• It gives the appearance of a contrived event.
• Many fans see it as just another very fat payday for millionaires.
• Did we mention no one understands it?
• The prestige associated with the majors just doesn’t transfer.

We applaud the PGA Tour for making an effort to overcome their late season doldrums. It has been a creative attempt to maintain interest while folks are busy getting ready for the real New Year’s Day: Labor Day.

The Tour understands that with football starting, baseball races getting interesting, kids returning to school and parents becoming taxi services they need something extraordinary to maintain interest.

The Tour has been receptive to constructive criticism and they have tried mightily to produce a series that is riveting. It just hasn’t happened and we’re not sure it can be fixed.

But we’ve come up with a couple of great ideas as alternatives.

The first option is take the winners of the four majors and have them play a 36 hole tournament. Offer them a pot full of money to play at a beautiful locale on a December weekend and the crowds and the TV ratings will go through the roof.  What’s that? It’s been done?

Yes, it’s been done since 1979 and this year it will be staged in Bermuda with Angel Carbrera, Lucas Glover, Stewart Cink and Y.E. Yang playing for a jaw dropping first prize of, hold your breath now, $600,000. Granted, the worst of the four will get $200,000 just for showing up but somehow, we just can’t imagine Tiger dragging himself off his yacht, firing up the G 5 and heading to Bermuda for a shot at that money.

In the 1960’s International Management Group, the mother of all sports representative agencies,  staged a TV series called “Big Three Golf” which had Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus and Gary Player going against one another in match play. Each match was filmed and they were televised over several weeks. It was a similar idea to the Grand Slam but it resides in the bowels of some film library now.

In 1983 IMG came up with another interesting idea: The Skins Game. Arnold, Jack, Gary and Tom Watson played hit and giggle over two days for a bunch of money and it was a ratings success for a couple of years but then it entered a slump of tedium and mediocre players and it sleeps with the fishes.

Ah, but we have another sure winner idea. Stage a 72-hole event with all tournament winners for that season at the end of the year. Oh, really? That’s being done?

Well, actually it has been staged since 1953 when Al Besselink prevailed. For the past nine years, Mercedes has been the sponsor and the tournament has been played in Hawaii in January. It’s presented as the first tournament of the new season which has never made a lot of sense.

Granted we have been in the depths of a recession but the event has been such a windfall for Mercedes that they abandoned their contract with the PGA a year early and in January 2010 the event will be sponsored by SBS. That’s the Seoul (Korea) Broadcasting System. It would seem logical that a tournament of champions for a given season would be played at the end of that season, not the beginning of another.

The challenge in all this comes from the nature of golf. The tournaments are self defining, distinct events. 72 holes, a cut, a winner. They are individual dramas played out over four acts (sometimes with play off encores.) The majors have a special importance and the Players Championship is getting there so it’s very difficult to come up with something to top those in gravitas.

The players know who the best is. They vote on the Player of the Year. There is special note made of the top official money earner. The PGA of America awards the Vardon Trophy to the leading low scorer on the PGA Tour (60 rounds minimum) and the PGA Tour presents the Byron Nelson Award (50 rounds minimum) for the same category. (The PGA of America - PGA Tour schism is a story for another day.)

Fans also think they know who is best. Most have their favorite and a rooting interest. So, all the Fed Ex Cup does is present a bunch of successful players an opportunity to make a pile of money before they pack it in for the year.

Our preference, if the PGA Tour thinks it must, would be to invigorate the Tournament of Champions. Stage it at the end of September, open it to all winners for the season, perhaps add the leading money winner from the European Tour and have a go at it for big money. It would maintain the flow of the season and add an exclamation mark.

Bravo to the Tour for trying the Fed Ex Cup, but maybe it’s time to move on to an old idea brought back to meaningful life.

Autumn arrived this week. We got the feel of it over the past couple of weeks but the sun made it official by crossing the equator on Tuesday.

We have a love hate relationship with this time of year. We love it for a lot of reasons.

• Cool, crisp, fresh morning air.
• Wisps of fog draped on fairways just after dawn.
• Courses have healed from the ravages of aerating and are back in first class condition.
• The trees are staging on their annual light show.
• Crowds have diminished. Casual players are back at work, watching football and doing other things.
• Great deals on equipment are everywhere. Retailers need to move inventory and get cash for next year.
• Greens fees are reduced at most public access clubs. Check out WEEI Country Club!
• We savor each round because it may be the last in warm weather.

We hate it because of all that follows. We’ve become much less tolerant of cold weather with age.

Of course, depending upon where you listen to WEEI sports programming your engagement with fall can be excrutiatingly short or wonderfully prolonged. Cold weather, frost and snow come early up north but courses stay open on the Cape and in parts of Rhode Island and Connecticut through the entire winter subject to the whims of the weather gods. Those gods have not been kind the past couple of years so maybe the Cape will catch a break this time around.

In 1966 a wonderful movie, The Endless Summer, was released. Many think of it as the definitive movie of the surfing culture. Two young guys traveled around the world seeking the perfect wave and encountered memorable surf and a cast of characters hard to describe. It was a stunning visual and uplifting emotional ride.

We have mused from time to time about that movie and dreamt about an endless summer of golf for a born and bred New Englander.

As the cold weather sets in, we’d pack the car and invite along a good golf buddy and head south. Between us, we’d know enough connected people to have access to top courses all the way down the coast. We’d pick  spots, perhaps Long Island, makes some calls and try to get on Shinnecock, Beth Page and others.

We’d try to stay a couple of weeks ahead of the cold and work our way down through New Jersey, Virginia and into the Carolinas. We’d play golf, drink scotch, eat at the locals’ favorites and try not to be too enslaved by an itinerary. If we found a place we liked (Charleston, SC comes to mind as a prime candidate) maybe we’d linger there for a while.

One of our buddies doesn’t belong to a club but he is a wonderfully engaging, entertaining story teller to whom people gravitate. He’ll walk cold into just about any social situation and depart having met everyone and having made a few new friends.

He says, with not a little pride, that he’s a member of Leechmore Country Club. Why pay the big tariff of a private club when he can play just about anywhere he wants? We’d try to persuade our pal to come along.

We’d time our trip to reach Miami in the dead of winter. We’d cross Alligator Alley, work our way up the west coast, cross over the Ponte Vedra a some point and then gradually follow the retreating frost line northward. We’d time our return to the Opening Day Shotgun at our home course.

It’s a fantasy, of course. Time, money, things to do. The usual stuff.

But life is about dreams and goals.

On the other hand, it might be easier to move to San Diego.

It’s the topic of the week. People losing control and acting like asses.

Regardless of your political affiliation, Congressman Joe Wilson’s shout of “you lie” to the President was way out there. Joe was followed by Serena Williams threatening a base line person at the US Tennis Open. And then Kanye West topped them all by intruding on Taylor Swift’s moment in the sun. (To that individual, our 23-year old daughter says, “Great music; bad brain.”)

We were invited to be a guest on a television program this week to talk about the rise in conspicuous incivility, particularly in sports. We witness so much show boating and bad behavior by athletes we become almost immune to its offensiveness.

As we were pondering the mire, we thought about golf and started to think about misbehavior. And we thought more and some more. Then we concluded: AH HA, another reason to be a proud golfer.

Although not precise, there is an interesting comparison between what happened with Serena Williams and something that happened a few weeks ago on the PGA Tour.

Serena was playing in the semi finals of the US Tennis Open in New York City, one of tennis’ four majors. Things weren’t going well and she was down a set and close to being finished off by a wild card entry, Kim Clijsters.

Tennis has a code of conduct that calls for warnings and then progressive penalties for bad behavior. Serena had already been penalized for seeing how many pieces her racquet would shatter into when she pounded the court surface. She was off her game and, making it worse, Kim hadn’t played tournament tennis in a couple of years and had delivered her first child 18 months previously, so this was a major upset in the making.

Like golf, tennis matches can turn in a moment with one bit of good or bad fortune so it quite literally isn’t over until the last point is decided.

As Serena was serving, down 4-5 in the second set, the base line judge called a foot fault. This caused Serena to completely unravel, and to describe to the lines person, profanely and loudly, what she wanted to do with the tennis ball in her hand. The lines person complained to the chair umpire, a penalty point was assessed and…game, set, match for Clijsters.

Given an opportunity to apologize for her behavior, Serena declined and instead focused on what she thought was a stupid, ill-timed foot fault call. Most knowledgeable tennis observers will agree 100% with that point. However, it was called and Serena had a choice: play on or melt down. She chose the latter.

What does this have to do with golf? Glad you asked.

At the Bridgestone Invitational in early August, Padraig Harrington and Tiger Woods were in the last group on the last day and having a heck of good battle. It had almost become match play.

Along came rules official John Paramor on the 16th tee. Certainly within his purview, he told Padraig and Tiger they were 17 minutes behind the group in front of them and told the players they were being put on the clock. That meant that the players were being timed between shots and if they exceeded specific allotted times, they would be assessed two stroke penalties.

Padraig and Tiger were the last twosome so they weren’t impeding anyone. The match was tight and interesting. But the rules official assessed the warning and both players were made aware of it.

In this day of incivility, it might be expected that one or both players would assault the official at least verbally if not with a two iron. Instead, they stated their case then accepted the ruling. Regrettably, it seems that it got to Harrington. He thoroughly botched the 16th hole and took an eight.

Tiger made it clear that it was his opinion that the ruling rattled Padraig and caused him to hurry then botch a very difficult flop shot he was trying to hit from behind the green. The next day, Tiger continued to complain about the ruling even though he was the victor because he thought it was grossly unfair and unnecessary.

Most knowledgeable observers of golf agree. Stupid, ill timed, unnecessary intervention by an official!

Harrington refused to blame the incident on his bad play. He noted that it certainly didn’t help but it was he who hit the shots. The players behaved in an exemplary fashion and few viewers were even aware of the warning until after the match.

So what’s the point? Civility may be an endangered, old fashioned concept but it’s alive and well in our game.

The 18th at TPC Norton was characterized by many during the Fed Ex Cup, this past week, as too easy. That got us thinking about what an 18th hole should be.

There are at least two distinct audiences to ponder that question. The first group is us, the everyday golfer. The second group consists of the PGA Tour players.

Our parameters for a great finishing hole are:

• It should be visually stunning and memorable.
• It should be challenging but not overly difficult. Who wants to finish with a triple bogey?
• The layout should be consistent with the theme and character of the course.
• It should DEFINITELY NOT be a par three!

We’ve had the chance to play some of the best golf courses in the world and to this day the 18th at Pebble Beach is our favorite closing hole. It is gorgeous as it borders the Pacific on your left. It’s a par five with a bail out opportunity to the right. It’s not overwhelmingly long or treacherous. It requires three good shots to a tricky, smaller green for a chance at birdie.

On the other hand, Cypress Point, just down the road from Pebble, is a fabled course yet it’s 18th is very disappointing. It’s a strange par four slight dogleg right with a tree in the fairway and an uphill second shot. There are those who say Cypress is a wonderful two hole course (15 and 16.)

Of the notable local courses, the final hole at Winchester, Salem, The Country Club and Charles River come to mind and meet the parameters set above. We may have a beef with some of their other holes but the closers are terrific. Kittansett, one of our favorites, disappoints with it’s 18th. It just isn’t special.

There are those who might take umbrage at our prohibition of par threes as legitimate closing holes. Tough! We prefer a par four or five.

We realize that everyones taste is different; that’s why they make chocolate and strawberry. We’ve written in the past about a course “fitting your eye” and that’s even more applicable when evaluating individual holes. So have at it. Debating hole quality is great sport in the 19th.

The other notable audience, players on the PGA Tour, views things through a different prism.

Ask them about what an 18th hole should be and you get a variety of answers. Tiger Woods has commented in the past that he wants a challenging risk and reward 18th presenting an opportunity for birdie or eagle when great shots are made. Others say they couldn’t care less. Everyone has to play it to finish. Of course, those are the guys who wear plaid pants and white belts.

The 18th at TPC Norton presents risk and reward. At about 540 yards, it doesn’t give a large advantage to the bombers because they must be wary of a pot bunker in the center of the fairway just beyond the normal landing area. The approach shot will be more than 200 yards, carrying over an ugly patch of jungle short of the green. The green is contoured, not particularly big and is surrounded by bumps and rough. It has a bunker right.

There were several eagles during the week, a bagful of birdies and it played the easiest relative to par of all 18 holes. But is that a bad thing?

Other 18th holes the pros often praise are at TPC Sawgrass, Doral, Bay Hill and, as noted for our audience, Pebble Beach.

Thanks to the legendary CBS Television golf producer, Frank Chirkinian, we are obsessed with the red numbers of under par. Almost 50 years ago, Chirkinianhad the bright idea to present the leader board withthe players’ scores relative to par rather than withtotal strokes taken. Imagine trying to follow a presentation with names followed by 266 through 15, or 271 through 17.

The pros think that way in an absolute sense but more importantly they just look at a hole and try to post the lowest possible score. Par threes are not favorites as finishers because the chance of scoring an ace is absurdly poor. They prefer to take a few whacks at the ball.

A tough par four like 18 at Bay Hill with water on the right, a boomerang shaped rolling green and the possibility of a downhill pitch if the green is missed left offers reward or disaster.

However, standing on the tee of a par five gives them the hope of picking up perhaps two shots on the competition. And that makes them warm and tingly.

So the muted criticism of the 18th at TPC Norton by some observers seems out of place or perhaps a case of non-golfers pretending to know what they’re talking about.

Round two of the FedEx Cup playoffs lands in Boston this week and it’s your chance to see the top 100 guys in person.

So, as a public service (honest!) we’ve moved up our posting this week to provide some guidance on what to bring and what to do if you go to TPC Norton. After attending a ton of tournaments, we’ve come up with a game plan that seems to work.

Like football, PGA golf on television is a match made in heaven.  At a tournament, even with on course TV screens, it is still very difficult to keep up with who’s doing what, where everyone is, who’s got the mo-jo, who’s choking like a dog and so on. The networks have mastered the story telling. So, we don’t even think about going on the weekend. It’s better on TV and the beer is cheaper.

If you decide to go, here are some ideas on what to take and what to leave home:

• No cell phones, no cameras. Most tournaments will stop you upon entering and check those items. That’s a hassle and you don’t want folks trolling through your phone list. Leave them in your car.
• Bring the obvious: sunscreen, hat, umbrella (check the forecast), light binoculars, shades, mosquito repellent (especially at Norton), some nutrition bars and water!
• If you’re roaming the course, consider bringing one of those little folding stools. Other than bleachers, which aren’t exactly butt friendly, there aren’t a lot of places to sit on the ground with a good view at TPC Norton.

Our preference has been to go reasonably early in the morning and watch a practice round (that would be Thursday, this week) for a few reasons:

• Smaller crowds, less expensive tickets, easier traffic/parking, space on the course to move around. Duh!
• If you care, you might actually have a conversation with one of the players as they’re waiting on a tee or moving around the grounds. Of course, that could be good or bad news. Tiger’s caddy, Big Stevie, might pick you up by the ankles and pile drive you into the turf.
• The guys really ARE good. It’s stunning to see how these 150 pound twiggies can hit the ball 300+ yards. Get close enough to a tee and you can hear the ball hiss when they unload with a driver.
• You have an opportunity to see the golf course, how it’s laid out and, especially, to get a clear mental image of the closing holes so when you see the tournament on television you will understand what the pros are looking at and the challenges they face.
• Visit the practice range and learn by watching how the players stretch, warm up and prepare before they play.
• Check out their bags and see what they actually carry and play rather than what you see them advertising.

TPC Norton is a different kind of course and a little more difficult to move around than the average tour stop. There are long distances between greens and tees and there are large areas you can’t access because of swamps and underbrush. When you get to the course you can buy a program for a mortgage payment or go to their website in advance and download a course map to get your bearings.

There are three general strategies in watching practice rounds. The first is to pick a player you like and follow him for the entire 18 holes. Sometimes players will notice folks following them and connect.

True story. Years ago, in my teens, a buddy and I followed long time tour player Bert Yancy for 18 holes at the old Pleasant Valley tournament. We were the only two following him. At the end of the round, as he walked past us, I asked him if I could please have his ball. He looked at me and said, “Beat it kid, I need it for my shag bag.” I was touched.

Back to strategies. The second option is to follow a player for a few holes, stay put in a comfortable spot to see some other groups go through and then leap frog ahead to pick him up on the back side.

The third option is to stay put at a particular hole, and see how guys play it. The fourth hole at TPC Norton is a 300 yard par four which tempts players to go for it. The green is nasty and it has some impressive bunkering. It’s an excellent risk and reward hole and in the practice rounds you’ll see players hit a couple of shots to help them decide how to play it when the gun goes off. That’s interesting stuff.

The 16th hole is also a good place to watch because it’s a short par three with lots of water and a testy green. It’s good for the ego to see the best in the world get a few wet.

If you’ve never been to a PGA event, you’re in for a treat. It’s fun to see the guys up close and watch how well they play. On the other hand, after watching what they do and comparing it to what we do, you may decide to buy a boat.